The Power of the Moment

This past summer, my family was in the midst of uncertain times. I had lost my job at the private school where my sons attended. Without the employee discount, we could no longer afford to send them to the school they had gone to since kindergarten. They were heartbroken. To try and cheer everyone up, I took them to see the new Disney movie "Inside Out". I thought it would be a light-hearted distraction and maybe give the boys and me something to laugh about, but then the scene in the video above came on the screen. While Bing Bong mourned the loss of his childhood friendship with Riley,  my sons and I sat in the theater holding hands and crying.  On the way home, my son, Johnny, said, "Mom, when you first lost your job, my sadness took over, but now, I think my joy is coming back." It was as if taking that moment in theater freed him up to feel happy again, to move on into our new normal. 

In May 2010, my hometown of Nashville, experienced a devastating flood. The neighborhoods around the Youth Center that my husband  and I directed were destroyed. We partnered with non-profits and churches to open an emergency shelter out of our gym, serving meals and collecting supplies. We took in dear friends whose homes had been flooded. I kept busy sorting through donations, washing clothes for flood victims, and delivering food, but as I kept moving from one job to the next, inside I felt sad, scared, confused, overwhelmed, and even guilty because our home remained standing while homes two streets behind us were gone. One busy morning, I stopped by my friend Velma's house to pick up food she had prepared for one of the community meals. I left my car running while I quickly stepped inside her door. When she asked me "How are you?", I started to answer "I'm fi---", but the tears took over to the point that I could barely speak. Embarrassed, I uttered, "I'm sorry I'm crying". Velma reached out and hugged me. She rubbed my back and whispered, "It's ok...take your moment...sometimes you just have to take your moment".  So I did, and after that moment, I was able to focus and move forward. 

Sometimes you just need to take the moment ----to cry, to rage, to feel, to breathe, and by doing that, you allow yourself to get back to living. Unfortunately taking the moment is not something we are wired to do. It has to be learned and re-learned which means at times, you have to be the one who gives the moment ----to your spouse, your children, your friend, your co-worker, your student. By providing that safe harbor for those around you where they can feel and speak openly without fear of judgement or reproof, you give them the fuel needed to press on.